First because of what you said on Saturday May 8th 2004 @ 11:42 EST, you gave clear EVIDENCE that you are not a THUG.

But I'll still be with you, even though im a Gangsta and you aint, its all good....

It seems people have been asking my some questions... and let it continue so all of you can ask a series of questions for me to answer.....

Whoever sweetheart, admirer and QTpie

sweetheart>: do u think you could ever fall in love with someone who is your direct opposite?

I dont think that is likely, I need someone to be as mature as I am, someone who is at my level. There are too many intangibles involved with "love" (or at least in my definition). I would have a hard time caring for someone who isnt strong above their shoulders. And plus if they my direct opposite that means they aint, how the hell could I be cool wit that??? HAHA.

<sweetheart>: if you were gonna move out, where would you move to, and into what kinda setting?

Hmm when I move out, I would have to say Park Ave and b/w 14st and 34st, not in Alphabet City and not in Greenwich.... defintely a high rise building.... 2 bedroom, no studio for me... and of course I would hook it up.... get me an interior designer (maybe mess around wit her- haha).... oh yea NYC.

<sweetheart>: where do you see yourself five years from now?

See above with a Porsche 911. And of course I'll prolly have to back to hustlin and being a playa.. you kno how I do..... HAHA

<admirer>: I thought u'd answer in ur posts, not here, describe your dream girl (other than PK), lol.

DREAM GIRL: One that understands. One that knows herself, secure with herself. One that is confident. But of course does not let her being get to her head, and gas herself up. Another importance, to be indepdent, attached to me yes, but does her own thing too.

<admirer>: that would include the physical and personality attributes

Physical:  ~  36-25-38,  haha... that sounds about rite . Got have eyes that suck me in. Hair would be good thing. Looks good to me... especially that smile, gotta be able to get my attention. And maybe this is not physical... but gotta have some style and can do it wit grace (but not too much grace, she has to be able to walk--Seinfeld reference, only Krysziu will get that).

<admirer>: and um, if you could have done anything academic wise what would it be? would you still be studying medicine?

Actually I also wanted to be a grade school teacher, and I think I still am. And I mean 3rd grade-5th grade, I dont have patience to teach kids how to read. But those years are cool, b/c subjects get specfic and children start to question material. And I think I'm gonna try to do that later in life.

<admirer>: do you sometimes wish you were more brown than gora, lol?

Chup (for non-Indians- shut up)... Im brown as any other, but I'm also everything else, NO LABELS... NO LABELS.

<QT pie>: hurrr's my 1st one....... slow and steedy or fast and hard?????

Slow and steady, thas the way to go. But not all the time, ya gotta change it up, but that would be my first preference.

Last nite, the entire fam when out to eat.. .Tamarind, W. 22nd st, I suggest it. Very good atmosphere and even better food. Its Indian food with an Americanizied flava (not actual flavor- for NON-THUGS). I started off with a few Taj Mahals (haha, yes in front of the parentals- its all good), some chat, samosas and ragarda patties.... all mad good. What is really good about the food is that its "healthier" Indian food, less oil, and the flavor is savoring, makes you want more and more.... hmmm maybe they put crack in the food??? HAHA. Then main course came out, a lot of paneer, potatoes and all that stuff, mad good let me tell ya. I had to literally take my pants off at the table (HAHA) to fit everything. Then we got desert, kulfi (Indian ice cream), mango ice cream- it was so rich - simply amazing and mango cheesecake. Mango cheesecake, you heard right, I have never tasted something so good.... well maybe PK tastes better... but food wise, this mite be my fave now. PK I'm gonna take ya there, dont you worry.... youll know wat im talkin bout.... and youre non-eating ass is gonna go nuts.

Tonite: Continuin the celebration of my bro's 30th bday, Climate Eight, anyone can come thru, and try to cheer me up, because the people I really want to come, arent coming..... damn smykeets (Trainspotting reference).

So anyone have "3" questions for me? QTpie you owe me two more.

Vivek is a busy guy, and the lovely people who get hurt by this are die hard fans... you the xangan who comes here every so often to see if there is something new goin on.... well....

Monday: nada, someone tried to front like that they didnt wanna talk to me but....

Tuesday: .... the next Tuesday couldnt help it and wanted to see me (haha)... Well I am, what PK calls me, God's Gift to Woman-- notice the singular.... haha... yea rite.... you kno Im all over...

Wednesday: Got to meet someone chill... it was iight.... only problem was, didnt know when the person was telling the truth or not, so I assume everything was a lie.... I keep life simple, no need to complicate things.

Thursday: Interview, it went well... who wouldnt want me... haha... iight im not that gassed, but still it went well. I saw Kill Bill Vol. 1, and it was GREAT, it tasted great, it smelled great, it felt great, it sounded great (haha) and it looked great... I think you enjoyed it too... FREAK-A-LEAK

Friday: Forgot to give my two weeks notice, I'll give it tomorrow. Then I chilled with Fat Bastard (and yes Fat Bastard is a girl, even though most (including myself) thinks she is a man- haha)... but it was cool, two weeks in a row... damn gots to be a record. But yea most of the nite was spent searching for a park (you dumb blond) and the rest of the nite was teaching this white girl to dance. Vivek tried his best, but couldnt get rhythm into her.... until she was able to do her own little dance... "Slap her with the dick, slap her with the dick... "--- And damn she was good at it.... haha (if you have not seen Never Scared by Chris Rock- you prolly didnt get that. It would have been useful to have my camera on me, but forgot it. BUT IN THE END I ONLY WANT TO TAKE ONE PICTURE (oh well).

Saturday: Holy crap, I saw her, another great day. Spent the day in Central Park and yes it felt as if we were alone... it was splendid. Well of course it was, when I'm there you're def gonna enjoy. Vivek (AKA God's Gift to Woman) is the solution, only rarely the problem... (I only say problem, b/c of course there is just that one... but lets not worry about that... and I'm glad we don't).

Then Tha Rappist (yes I spelled it right), called me up to come up to the ROCK  for a BBQ, which I did. Chilled up there, got see his boys and got to see BRITA, long time since I saw her. He had some gardenburgers waiting for me, mad chill cat, goin out of his carnivore ass from me. Def one of the chillest cats from BING. Of course had to free some freestyling and some his BIG SANT mixtape.. but its all good. Then somehow I drove 1.5 hours in my tired (and 3 beers... which is pretty much water) state.

Sunday: Mad lazy day.... Ive been so busy, making me mad tired.... but still I went to the gym, chilled wit my Comrade and bought some ZIRH shit... (Zirh makes products for us men who like to keep their mug (face) tight). Well pretty much I gotta get my lazy ass in the gym and keep my shit right because someone else mite take PK away from me.... I gotta make sure she knows the deal, and im the shit and no one else is.... even though she already knows that.

Today was mainly biographically.... I will get more interesting next time, but come on SLAP HER WITH THE DICK.... that had to have someone cracking up.... esp if you could actualy see the dance.

In addition, to all the lovely Ladies out there, dont worry God's Gift to Woman well do his best to get to all of you, just have some patience (I KNOW YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THAT).

I have so much rage and destruction in my body right now, and I can't get it out. A lot of shit right now in my life.... but luckily I got some people who are here for the support, especially one young lady who waited up for me last nite...

Tomorrow I will get confirmation on where Im going in August, which I guess is good... I dont like uncertainity...

Yesterday started bad and got even worse each subsequent second.... but hopefully this feeling will leave me soon.

Friday, Im giving my two weeks notice, no more working with the posh people of NYC, and being ridiculed by Fat Bastard b/c I work with fabrics.

HAS came back from Peru... so my nite life will get that more interesting... when I go out I make sure others have a good time, when HAS is out, there is no doubt there is a good time. And congrats to her that she got into her #1 choice for vet school (I say these comments and no one even knos who I'm talkin bout--- all good).

Last nite was the culmination of my bad day. I go to get my car and I park it out, right outside the bar, to pick my people. Someone a couple of minutes later gets into his car, throws his door open and dings my car.... (i kno its minor), but I go outside to check out and sure enough there is a scratch. And well my car has been through mad shit (my momz cursed it when we first got it-- EXPLANATION: its and Indian thing-- i dont wanna explain)... so it pissed me off. As the guy tries to pull out his car, I move my car and get in the way. We both roll down our windows and I tell him, why did you hit my car? He says move. His friend gets out and comes to my window. I say why did you friend hit my car, he says move. I say I have no problem, I just want to know why he hit my car, he says move. Now all my friends are at the car, and a fight almost breaks out b/w all of us at 14th st and 9th ave no less ( for non- NYers, this is The West Village, popular part of town). So finally I tell everyone, this is worth it, lets just bounce (and plus I wanted to call PK).... but then one of these fuckin Russian bastards, takes his elbow and throws it into the trunk of my car... and its funny, my antenna got in his way. So now my antenna is bent out of shape and dent on my trunk. And if you guys dont know, I have a serious RAGE problem, I went back into my car and stared at my CLUB. Ive pulled out the steel rod and come close to using it beofre, but last nite I was so ready to send these guys to the hospital. I didnt care about them, didnt care bout my future, didnt care if went to jail, didnt care about anything. I wanted to take out everything wretched, unhappiness, every sadness of my soul and flush it through this weapon and let them feel it. I came so close it scaried me. Luckily I didnt do it, I didnt leave my car again, cause if I did..... And still 12 hours later, I cant get this feeling out of me, I feel unsatified, this taste in my mouth that is awful, because I wanted to release my anger. And wat sickens me further... this feeling I have, is not me, I am not this belligerent, and Im hating myself because of it.

FUCK.

(Yeah) What would fuck me up more
Watching her lick her lips
Or watching her walk she hypnotize me with her hips (yeah) man
I sweet talking her if she like
Cause all she really want is a nigga to treat her right right
Look I'm legit now used to break laws
Now you can reap the benefit of world tours
Big house big Benz girl it yours
Mink coats Italian shoes stones with no flaws
You ain't go to look like a model for me to adore you
All you gotta do is love me and be loyal
Don't Indulge in my past fuck what happened before you
Cause their be some homies gonna hate you that never saw you
Come here let my touch on you I let you touch on me
Put my tounge on you you put your tounge on me
Let me ride on you and you can ride on
We can do it all the night
We can have a balla tonight

I wanna get to know you
I wanna get to know you, baby
One dose of my lovin'
I'm simply gonna drive you, crazy

I wanna be your lover
I wanna get to know you, lady
One dose of my lovin'
I'm really gonna drive you, crazy

I wanna be your lover
I really understand you, baby
I wannt be your lover
I really understand you, baby, baby, baby, baby.

Yea so work kicked my ass this week, I didnt get home any day this week earlier than 9pm, but one nite we had a corporate dinner at Sparks Steak House (where Gotti became the Mafia Boss in 1985) which was really cool... funny how PK was only one block away from me and I couldnt see her. There were 11 of us, the bill had to be at $1500, def the most expensive dinner I have ever been to. Im so dumb I should have ordered blue label too (FUCK)... haha....

What else is up.... missed by Happy Hour Club on Thursday... my bad guys, I was mad tired.... you will def see me next week. Today I watched the Mets lose, played ball (basketball for the ghetto inclined) for the first time in about 6 months, and I sucked. I gotta put some work in....

Last nite, went out to some party... got to see Big Sant, havent seen him in a while... dumass got thrown out of the bar... haha... it wasnt a bar you could easily get thrown out of, it was actually a private party and yet it still happened...

All in all, Life is very good b/c PK has entered it... she has made food to taste better, air seem fresher and every breath important...

Monday: Was good... long day at work, was quickly alleviated by a very special woman....

Tuesday: Was good...long day at work, was quickly alleviated by a very special woman...

IIght I'll write more.... First Monday was an honorary day, actually a very sad one, if you dont know wat I am talking, you should never say you enjoy American music (NEVER). PK (thas the special woman- b/c she is a PLAYA KILLA- yes Vivek doesnt wanna be a playa no more) made it a more happier day, she has the affect on people. But I cant believe its been 10 years... 10 years, there is still such a following people born after 1987-1994, like them.... incredible.

Tuesday was really good cause of PK, then my comrade and I went to Mamouns for some Falafels... so that means he picked me up from the city. Wat a good young lad. But I got bad news as I was speaking to a friend of mine, she told me what happened to her a few months ago, now thas the second friend of mine that has suffered in the same way.... dont let me find this person, I would end him....

But Tuesday ended very well.... very well.... THE METS WON THEIR SEASON OPENER.... My Asian brother Matsui ripping it up.... but currently the Mets just blew a 6-0 lead, now down 9-6, hopefully then come back....

I took off from work for the next two days, so Im just gonna lounge around (actually I cant- I have to run a lot of errands)... Also good, I've been goin to the gym consistently, gettin back to my form... thas why I took down the previous pic, dont need that reminder no more.... maybe now I will mix the profile pick up now.... I dont kno.... Krysziu.... wat should I do... and dont say butt- naked... that just wouldnt be far to all the chicas out there.....

All I ever wanted
All I ever needed
Is here in my arms
Words are very unnecessary
They can only do harm

How fitting are those lyrics (you agree?). Yea Vivek is the man, can't help it ya kno..... But seriously, this week has been amazing, out of all "11 incidents" , I have never felt like this... mad weird.... mad weird... but yea, just so you know.... you iight, no big thing---- HAHA. I have never met someone, who has actually fully understood me (yea maybe one of the 11 did, but not in this way). You not only understand me, but you listen and dont judge. Cause everyone has made mistakes, but you take me as is, all faults included. And you see my faults which is even more important, you dont glorify me.... I feel really good, in ways you dont you even understand.....

But of course all good things come to end, and I only mention it b/c we are star-crossed and we already know our end... unlike Montague and Capulet, they at least didnt know and didnt have to think about it. Im trying my best to not think about it and actually it doesnt matter, because I am living in the NOW, like I always do and Im enjoying NOW. Worry about that crap later....

I just want you to know

I found a reason for me

To change who I used to be

A reason to start over new

And the reason is you

No, thank you.

But wait a sec', give me time to explain, women and fast cars
And diamond rings can poison a rap star
It's suicidal, how I smoke in so much la'
I saw a dead bird flyin through a broken sky
Wish I could flap wings and fly away
To where black kings and Ghana stay
So I could get on my flesh right away
But that'll be the day when it's peace
When my gat don't need to spray
When these streets are safe to play
Sex with death, indulge in these women
Vision my own skeleton swimmin in eternal fire
Broads play with pentagrams in they vagina
Like the Exorcist, then they gave birth to my seeds
I beg for God's help, why they love hurtin me?
I'm your disciple, a thug certainly
I'm the N the A to the S-I-R
If I wasn't I must've been Escobar
Forty-five in my waist, starin at my reflection
In the mirror, sittin still in the chair like my conception
When everything around me got cloudy, the chair became a king's throne
My destiny found me
It was clear why the struggle was so painful
Metamorphosis, this is what I changed to
And God, I'm so thankful

Youre da man, Youre da man....

That right there is my ANTHEM....

Friday: got BENT, I mean I was barely able to walk.... iight not that bad, but let me tell ya the best part of the nite, was not at 2 I's, it was conversating before and after wit an very interesting individual...

About that individual: Hmmm a lot things I can say, but if I say too much, some other guy mite get her attention and I def would not like that. And def too many compliments I can say. But on another interesting note..... its funny how something happens when you least expect it, even though you have been waiting for it, for awhile (SORRY THE VAGUENESS- its just the way it has to be for now), and it actually takes ya sometime to figure out wats goin on. DAMN (SHUDUP KRYZSIU- I remember wat you said, let not go that far... iight BITCHASS)... anyway.... Im sorry if Im confusing ya, I dont wanna do that, Im here to make ya happy too.... Of course you know, its not easy for me on this side either... Im tryin my best not to worry.... its hard though.

IIGHT FOR THE REST OF MY FANS here are some pics Ive been taking (actually Kryzsiu)....

Vivek before the Heinken

Then after

METROSEXUAL VIVEK:

How long you think it was going to take for you to see this?

Well like I said I had a really good time and there best be a time when I can buy for you (no one really has ever paid, so you are def the first). Who is this, the rest of you might be asking.... well my first internet rendevous...

Thanks you made it a memorable one, so now its up to make more......

HAHA - I told ya I laugh at everything....

A lot of stuff has been happenning:

I am on a mission to drink everyday for a week. So far Thrusday, Friday, Saturday are done, and Im working on today... I have plans for Tuesday but I need to take care of the other two days of the week.....

Why you may ask, well I think Guiness and Scotch (NEW WORD: GUINSCOTCH). She is really good to me, never lets me down. So I guess I can say I'm not lonely anymore since I have found someone.

WELL lets be realistic. No one really is gonna let me marry or attempt to procreate with GUINSCOTCH.... so Im gonna have to find an alternative (HAHAHA). I went out on Thrusday, just got bent w/ my comrade. Well he didnt, but I most certainly did. Friday, chilled wit my brother and his friends. Metronome, the MATCH party (MATCH= matching Residenices, Doctor stuff), the best part was that we got in for free. Chillin with one of my brother's friends most of the nite, which was really cool... mad chill guy, mad funny too. He got me introduced to so many chicks,  I couldnt remember all their names. Well each chick I spoke to more/less was not interested in me. One chick, after having a long convo, asked my age, and then she said and I quote "Ohh, Im 25, so I'll see ya later"-- ok. Then some other chick was talkin to me, I guess I displayed my disinterest, so she didnt want to waste her time. I was tryin to talk, but she didnt have much to say. What else, oh yea, my friends and I were playing ROCK/PAPER/SCISSCOR to determine who would buy the next round. So some random chick wants to play too, she loses. I felt bad so I bought the round and then we get to talking and she says "I came with my boyfriend". So I got her a drink and she has a man, I got great luck.... But all in all I had a good time, I stole a bottle from the bar (my friends from BING and I are notorious for that), but in my drunken stupor got caught pouring it to a friend. Eventually met up some other friends of mine, but it was a quality outing.

LAST NITE: was awesome. Kinda relived Summer of 99. FAT BASTARD, my comrade and myself. Damn I really got drunk, so much that I was starting to think that I have problem, but then I realizied GUINSCOTCH is one of my few friends, and my present girlfriend, so I felt that rationalization was good for me. The three of us were just chatting away, but random stuff, a lot of stuff. We all know each other pretty well and we are all "thinkers". I'll clarify, we have opinions and we have reasons for them. We dont talk out of our ass, well sometimes I do (HAHAHA- I know you (NIPS) like that). But yea so we take problems/debates/anything and find solutions, thas just wat we do. As mentioned from FAT BASTARD, in my drunken state, I got into beef (a fight) with a poodle, we were going at it for a while, but in the end I was victorious, the bitch didnt kno wat she was messing wit. I also did about 1 minute on a treadmill, but I was not satisfied. So I ran backwards on the treadmill, which my friends very much enjoyed.

Very cool nite last nite, we will attempt to continue that tonite... And yea I got a lot on my mind, but not much time, but I will make a strong attempt to post more.....